The Ballad of Ronnie Jenkins-Trump

Donald Trump's unknown half-brother from Missouri.

Every President has “that brother”.  Jimmy Carter had Billy.  Bill Clinton had Roger.  Jeb Bush had George.  Well, The Donald is no exception.  Trump has Ronnie, his own half-brother standing in his luminescent orange shadow. This is the exclusive inside look at Ronnie Jenkins-Trump and his one man mission to meet his famous brother and get two Trumps on the ballot in November.

A word from Ronnie Jenkins-Trump (RJT)

I love America. I love my brother.  I love Styx. I love Foghat.  I love Frampton’s early work. But  I love one thing the most…Roadhouse.

America is like the Double-Deuce, a rough n tumble bar in Jasper, Missouri.  It used to be a nice place, but due to nefarious influences and poor leadership, the Double-Deuce has become a bastion for the unruly and corrupt. 

My Brother Donald is like Patrick Swayze/James Dalton (Most people don’t know that his first name was James but I do ‘cause I’m awesome). He is a big time New York City Bouncer called in to restore order and make the Double-Deuce great again.

Hilary is like Brad Wesley, the corrupt dude who has been around forever and owns the town and tries to boss everyone around. And Bernie is like Brad’s henchman Billy, he’s the real badass but Hilary won’t let him run shit so he has to act like a fuckin’ wildcard.

Even tho Dalton is a total fuckin’ badass, he needs help when these two butt nuggets gang up on him. That’s where Ronnie comes in.

See, I’m like Sam Elliott/Wade Garrett, Dalton’s right hand man from way the fuck back who helps him kick ass and take names. He is Dalton’s most trusted associate and also a total fuckin badass and together they clean up the Double Deuce and the whole damn town.

Wade Garrett also gets stabbed in the chest which sucks, but that won’t happen to me cause my Trump Heart would bend the blade. Swayze/Elliott = Dalton/Garrett = Donnie/Ronnie 2016 GET IT!

Overall everybody at my brothers rally was real nice and fun to hang out with.  I didn’t get to meet my brother but I won’t never give up. I know when he sees this video he will invite me to be his vice-president and that will be awesome as hell.

I Love you Donald and America,

Ronnie

 

A Word from Rafe Williams

As a comedian, it is nice to be reminded of the reasons I started doing comedy in the first place:  to have my voice heard and to get a little bit of justice.  Comedians have an obligation to present the world the way it is to us, to stand-up and tell our truth. Wild exaggeration through stand-up, satire, or sketch can often unearth an undeniable nugget of truth for the rest of the world to see, and that makes the 13-year-old idealist inside us feel pretty good,

Attending the rally allowed me to meet people from both sides of the aisle and overall, they were pretty decent folks. There were agitators on both sides, but very few and far between, and despite what I saw on the evening news, it was a far cry from a racially charged “war zone.”  

I saw pictures of Ronnie later that day, being used to pilot hate-filled rants from both ends of the political spectrum. I was with Ronnie the entire day and not one person asked him who he was or why he was there. This concerns me as a citizen. The media have taken context out of reporting and began creating their own narrative.   What once was a mighty watchdog for the public has become a lapdog for ratings.  The press is no longer free, it is at best a slave, a house-boy to corporate sponsors and super-pacs. The news is catered to extremes.  Extremes are dangerous and often lack validity due to unwillingness to even entertain someone else’s point of view.   “If it bleeds it leads” has become the calling card of once responsible journalism.

My point?  Truth through wild exaggeration is the job of the comedian, not the journalist.   

It was an honor to work with Ronnie on this project and I hope one day he gets to meet his brother.

I Love you Ronnie and America,
Rafe

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